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The beliefs we have about ourselves can feel ingrained and difficult to change. Our self-esteem is what we think about ourselves and how much we value ourselves. It is our self-perception, an amalgamation of our opinions, thoughts, and capabilities that we think we have.

Sad on Couch

These opinions are often formed in childhood and are heavily influenced by our experiences and the people we are surrounded by. If one was bullied at school’ for example or had critical parents who often praised their siblings instead, it is possible that they will struggle with confidence and low self-esteem. The negative perceptions we have about ourselves are created because our subconscious attempts to protect us by preventing us from repeated bad experiences and the associated emotions. 



People with low self-confidence tend to have low self-esteem and vice versa. Being confident in yourself and your abilities lets you know you can rely on yourself to manage different situations. Many factors can result in low confidence or low self-esteem, and they will differ from one person to another. Some examples include:

  • Being abused

  • Being bullied

  • Struggling to find a job

  • Losing your job

  • Discrimination

  • Stress

  • Relationship difficulties

  • Body image concerns

  • Money problems

  • Physical or mental health conditions

  • Overly critical parents



Low confidence can hugely impact our happiness because it makes it difficult for us to recognise what we are good at.

This can :

  • hold us back professionally and personally

  • Struggle to practice self-care, which can lead to stress and burnout.  

  • Create avoidant personality 

  • A reluctancy to leave the comfort zone

  • A sense of being trapped.

  • Long-term low self-esteem can lead to depression and anxiety.  

  • People pleasing 

  • Negative Social Comparison

  • Fear of failure 

  • Negative self talk

  • Feelings of not being worthy 

What can be done

Low self-esteem is effectively a learnt behaviour; it is something we have learnt after years of repetitive thinking. Because this behaviour is subconscious, it is difficult to alter it through willpower alone. A number of things will help, such as noticing negative self-talk, practising forgiveness and compassion for self, spending time to acknowledge wins and celebrating accomplishments, both the big and the small achievements.


At Remedi, we have a number of workshops, classes, and guided meditations that can help you build your confidence and self-esteem, helping you achieve your full potential.

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